Okay, Adult ADD speaking here. I was diagnosed as a
"Hyperactive" child, this was the first term they used to label us. The
verbiage has changed but the symptoms are the same. My Dad has been in social
services for most of my life and was familiar with the only medicine used back
then, Ritalin, and he didn’t like what he saw it do to the kids taking it. As a
result he refused to have me medicated. He never told me I had a ‘disability’
either. I never knew until I was diagnosed as an adult with adult ADD. I was
encouraged to take medication and I tried for awhile but was appalled by the
lack of emotion I felt most of the time, I was just coasting through my days
and nothing really touched me. What most people diagnosed with ADD really need
is attention. Let me explain. Attention Deficit Disorder is an apt name because
it describes both the signs and the treatment. The subject has difficulty
focusing on any one thing, emotion or idea at a time. This difficulty is demonstrated
through displaying a sense of irritation. This can often be helped by continued
assistance from someone who will listen to what they have to say or in other words pays attention, you see this person has a deficit of attention. I had a
mother who listened to me all the time and that was the best medicine I had as
a youth. I now have the best wife in the world who listens to be all the time
and that has kept me improving for the 13 years we have been married. When
someone else is there and is understanding of the problem it makes the person
who has it feel less guilty for mistakes they make and feel like all of their
thoughts aren’t just drifting off into the ether sphere to never be heard or
seen again these feelings are a large part of the aggravation they display.
They can actually matter to someone even if that person can’t remember all of
the things that are shared. This improves their confidence to accomplish tasks
and their overall drive rises. Like any disability understanding is a large
part of the battle and not feeling like it is your fault is most of the rest of
the battle. Not feeling like others are purposely ignoring you helps greatly as
well.
People with ADD have neurons in their brain that firing too
fast to be caught by the receptors. Most of the drugs that are administered
slow the firing process down. This will calm down your average patient but it
will also remove a lot of his/her creativity. Don’t get me wrong I am not
adverse to medication. I also have asthma and other ailments so I have been
taking medicines all of my life. But there are some medicines that are
classified as mood altering drugs. ADD meds are in this group because although
the primary goal is not to alter the
patient’s mood, is it a primary result
of the medication.
Try some REAL effort with your child, listening and trying
to understand what they are talking about. You will find that your bond with
them will increase and their need to communicate all of the time will ease. If
they have the hyperactive element of the problem then find ways to let them get
outside a lot of the time to get rid of the excess energy. If they are old
enough then talk to them teach them what is wrong and what you can do to help
them. Teach them that they are special in many ways. Most people with ADD are
actually more intelligent than those around them and part of their problem is
that they feel lost when no one understands them. Try harder to get what they
are saying and they will learn ways to communicate with you better. I will
admit there are those who are so stricken with this ‘disorder’ that they simply
cannot function in society without some chemical help. However, I do not
believe most are in that boat. If you are hesitant to dope up your child you
are right to feel that way. Most of the kids diagnosed these days are the way
they are simply because we have TV’s and other forms of entertainment media
raising our kids and the frustration of not being heard builds up and is demonstrated
in ways that appear to be ADHD. A kid can’t talk to a TV or a video game and
get the love and affection he/she needs.
Be the parent your child needs. Try it you might like it.
